Last night...

Last night.

laying at the edge of my bed,

I had a wonderful dream,

so that reality almost seemed like a nightmare.

I had it all!

I was happy! I was not alone!

Last night

I woke up in the middle of the night,

Where did the dream go?

I woke up alone,

again...

Last night,

I sat down on the side of the bed,
missing you...
thinking of you..
wondering where you are...

Last night
I blamed myself...
for I don't know what
pondering if I should apologize
for whatever I've done wrong
even though I'm not sure what that is.

Last night
I was afraid
scared of the distance
and the indifference
that kills me slowly
but i can constantly feel their presence...

Last night
I wished you were here
close to me!
I wished...
...for your embrace
... for you kiss.

Last night
I cried a little...
even when I tried to swallow the tears
hoping it would be easy...
to forget, to let go...
why is it so hard?

Last night
I hoped for answers
for a response to all the questions
inhabiting my head and am afraid of asking
'cause I fear the reactions
non regardless you push me away.

Last night
...a part of me died a little.